The Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Resolution Model

The Thomas-Kilmann conflict resolution model describes five strategies for addressing conflicts. The five strategies lie on two axes: assertive and cooperative.

Each of the strategies ranges between assertiveness and unassertiveness and cooperative and uncooperative. No strategy is right or wrong, there’s an appropriate time to use each one.

Accommodating

The accommodating style is commonly seen when people want to be unassertive and cooperative. Not every conflict needs to be a war — conflicts worth accommodating are those battles that are strategically lost to win the war.

Here’s an example:Let’s say a colleague or customer complains about a process, but not an outcome. Perhaps you ran a report that yielded the results the other party needed, but the report was in PDF form and not Excel.The other person didn’t specify a preference but took issue with the delivery.

By simply accommodating the request, you prove to be a helpful, solutions-oriented team member.

Avoiding

The avoiding conflict strategy is reserved for individuals who are more inclined to be unassertive and uncooperative in mitigating conflict.Generally, this is an apathetic approach — people who adopt this strategy want no parts of the conflict and would rather wait for it to blow over.

This strategy is best for small annoyances, one-off mistakes, and issues that would otherwise be worsened by addressing them.

Here’s an example: A conflict you might avoid in the workplace is when someone drinks the last of the water from the water cooler without replacing the water container. If it’s a one-time issue, leave it be.

It’s likely not worth the 2-minute discussion in the all-hands meeting.

Collaborating

If you want to keep a relationship intact and find a solution that works for everyone, try the collaborative style of conflict resolution.This strategy is both cooperative and assertive which means that all parties will be heard and the solution that is chosen should work well for everyone.

Here’s an example: A conflict you might collaborate on at work is a process between two separate teams. Perhaps the sales team needs to hand off customers to the support team once the deal is closed, but customers aren’t being contacted after the handoff.

The two teams may collaborate to streamline the workflow. The sales team may stagger the deals they close so that support can keep up with the demand. It’s a win-win for both parties.

Competing

Assertive and uncooperative, the competing conflict style is an intense approach to resolving grievances.It’s not uncommon for a competing conflict resolution strategy to yield a positive outcome for one party and a negative outcome for the other.

Here’s an example: You might see a competing conflict management strategy used when negotiating deals. Lawyers may use this strategy to get the best legal outcome for their client at the expense of the other party.

A competing strategy works here because it’s highly unlikely that the lawyer will cross paths with the opposing party again, so there’s no relationship to maintain or salvage later.

Compromising

People tend to compromise during conflicts when they are assertive and cooperative in negotiating a solution.This strategy may sound harsh, but it’s usually employed when time is of the essence and there’s no time to hear everyone’s concerns or opinions.

The compromise is based on the most important and urgent facts that can bring about a decision that works for the time being.

Here’s an example:A team might compromise on a solution to cancel an event at the last minute due to issues with the venue. While it may not be the best solution for revenue, prolonging the conflict doesn’t help the situation.

So a compromise to cancel the event and figure the rest out later is the best solution for customers, employees, and vendors.

Why manage and resolve conflicts

Conflict doesn’t have to be a scary eight-letter word.Addressing conflict is how we strengthen our relationships and express our expectations in relation to those of others.

By understanding the five conflict resolution strategies and applying the skills that make them effective, you’ll know exactly when to avoid conflict and when to address it.Your relationships with your coworkers and customers will be better for it.

(Reference: https://blog.hubspot.com/service/conflict-resolution-skills)